Oct 27, 2011

Words Mama Never Said (B)





       As I set to work, my eyes caught a red velvet fabric lying fallow on the grubby ground. It had been neatly tucked underneath the doors that led into the open space I laboured in. It was not a first sight and so it induced irritation and much contempt. I knew it was a woman that stood hidden behind those huge doors.
            "Those layabouts" I murmured with stale breath.
            I eyed the fabric with utmost disgust fully aware of their practice. They sure knew how to attract the men folks I thought. I turned my eyes away from the door and towards the lustful men than filled the room. A noise had erupted suddenly and they all had their evil eyes fixed on the door.
           "You've got our attention. Unravel your presence" A man shouted from behind me. No one came forward and soon noise diffused through the room once again. One thing had changed I noted. the fabric had been shifted from its original position to a new one. I smiled as I took in the changes I descried.
            "Was she opting out? She might be new at this" I decided to take a peep around the room. Maybe my so focused look at every movement she made was making her uneasy. I looked over at my friend who had confusion written all over his face. His eyes seemed to follow some sort of motion I could not comprehend by merely gazing at him. Soon his eyes fell on mine and it did lead to the questioning look my face transitioned into. He only smiled at me and gave me a go ahead with his hands which I shoved off by ignoring him. After this, I continued searching the busy room.
            "Hey sire do you go by the name Joe?" I was shocked when I heard this. Where was this feminine voice coming from?" Now every eye in the room fell on me and I had no other choice but to divert my attention to where I perceived the voice was coming from.
            "Noo" I stammered. My mind could not but say she was beautiful and my eyes conceal my lustful passions. She was one with long curly hair hair, oblong face with piercing eyes and hips that stood out no matter what posture she took.
           "Would it be okay if I took some of your time?" She said in a seductive tone that I could not help but agree too. I did want to speak at that moment. If I could scream yes without having the rest of the crowd laugh at me hysterically, I would have done so. Finally! I get to be alone with a woman in a dark room. The thought of it made me smile. I was evolving into a man.
            "No!" An unruly voice interrupted my thoughts.
           "I would not have you steal our man from us at this hour. We demand some form of entertainment" Malik my master called out from way behind the room. The rest of the crowd also echoed yes in unison. The room had fallen to its loud and rowdy state once again.
           "Sure! If that's all it takes to spend some quality time with him". She responded and without wasting much time, she took to the empty space that had been cleared out for her. She was a beauty to behold. Her body moved in accordance to the sound of the wind. I was lost in thoughts again.

                                                                            **********
             We did spend the cold night together. Although not wrapped in each other's embrace. She lay on the bed in her white garment while I slept on the hard and cold floor in my favourite white shorts in anticipation for the night.
             My face was hard when I heard her words. "I just need a place to lay my head. I did not come for this" I understood I was a boy evolving into a man like my people would say but I could not comprehend why she teased me so much only to kill those feelings whirling up within me. I was tempted to go beside her, devour those clothes off her smooth skin to get the pleasures due for a man but I could not. Her eyes revealed its innocence. Her face was damped with tears that streamed down her bouncy cheeks.
             I moved my hands towards her cheeks to wipe off the tears. I could see she was in pain. There was no way I was going against her
will. She did not deserve it. I was still a virgin. I did plan to loose it someday but this way I thought was perverse. I fled her side and went straight to my temporary bed.
             She awakened to the morning air smiling. I saw this and I took pleasure in myself.
            "Hey Kiddo" She said to me from where she was. "Do you know of any Joe? I came into town yesterday and so I am not yet familiar with the environment"
            I blushed for reasons unknown to me; maybe because of those eyes that were constantly focused on me.
           "Ma'am! Heaven is on your side. I said. "You're at the right place. I would bring to his notice that you are in search of him"
            "Thank you very much" She said smiling back at me.
            "You welcome. Give me a sec" I said before dashing out of the room. A few seconds later, Joe stood in front of her with his hands tucked in his pocket. "I'm  Joe. Who might you be?"
            "Abigail! Abigail, remember?"
I was confused. Remember? Did they know each other? What was I missing here?
            "Abigail?" Joe called out.
            "Yes!" she said with her eyes wide open
            "It does ring a bell but the Abigail I recall is fair skinned and plump. You don't look anything like her"
            "It's me Joe. I mean Hussein" No one else knew about Joe being called Hussein except the two of them.
            "Hussein? could you be? Oh my God! Abigail, what happened to you? He said walking towards her to offer her a hug.
            "My desperate search for love and money. This is what it got me. I never stopped thinking of you, you know?"
            "So did I, every single moment of the day"
            "My son, do you still have him in your care?" She said brushing him off.
            "Son?" I burst out from the shadows I hid in.
            "He's over there" Joe said smiling. "He's a man with fine manners. "You did a good job with him"
            "Oh mine! Ali it's mama. Wow! You did grow well without me"
I was quiet now, I know I longed for that day when I would see her again but I never imagined we would meet in such an awkward situation.
            "What if I.... Oh Lord bless my soul"
           "Come over, can't you see the joy in her eyes? Joe said pointing to me.
           "I See very well sire. I would like to be alone with her"
           "Of course! You two got to settle your differences" He said before leaving us two.
           "What in heaven's name were you thinking?" I said in a husky voice I never knew I possessed. "What If I..... Did you think about that before you played your silly trick on me?" I was mad. I took to throwing things around.
           "Ali! Look at me"
           "Don't Al me. I did change that name ever since you left me"
           "You've every reason to be mad but you should at least hear me out first"
           "Aha! What other reason apart from the ones you've mentioned? You very much in love with your slutty business. How much were you paid? Did you get enough joy grinding with your numerous admirers? Tell me! Now you cannot speak up. You're afraid to speak?"
           "You hurting me" She called out with tears in her eyes. This was when I realized I was holding her hands tightly.
           "I'm sorry. I was just mad. Those men had their fifthly hands on you yesterday. I would have done so too if I was unable to resist you. She was smiling now. "Is it that funny? I'm serious here"
           "You were quite different from the rest. I knew you would do me no harm"
           "How sure are you? I could have"
           "You were too timid". She said bursting into a loud laugh."You have not had many women in your life eh?"
           "Hey! Stop the jokes. Let say you played a smart one on me. Anyway, what you here for?"
           "You of course"
           "I see, not for Joe? So who is he to you? I see you two are close"
           "He's an old friend"
           "An old friend? That's it? Mama who you kidding? Me? I can see the love burning in your eyes. You did like him one"
           "No"
           "Ha! You a liar. Why lie? Is he an old crush of yours?"
           "No. You like him?" She said shifting the focus of the conversation from her to me.
           "Of course I do. He took care of me"
           "Thank God" She said giving a sigh
          "Why Thank God? I do not see why we are thanking any one here or have you decided to rework things with him?"
          "We'll decide on that amongst ourselves. You know, k-no-w..that Joe is your papa, your old man was always alive". There was much hesitation on her path as she said this.
          "How? I thought you said my papa was long dead?"
          "I did say that because I was going to be married to Lord Rowland"
          "Lord Rowland? The man who came by our house everyday with gifts? Where is he now? How could you deceive me?"
          "I did that for you. For us Ali. She hit his chest as she spoke. He was a poor man. There was no way Hussein could take care of us both. I did like him as a friend but he forcefully slept with me and so I vowed I would never let him know you were his. I was wrong. I thought money could buy happiness" She paused for some air before speaking up again. "Lord Rowland did leave me once he reconciled with his old wife. He threw me out. I was on the street. I had no other choice but to sell my body. I needed some money to survive, I miss you"
           "So that's why you left me here?"
           "No! I could never do that"
           "Buy you already did!"
           "Lord Rowland promised to have you with me once I got settled with the paper work for the marriage. He wanted to be sure our love blossomed before bringing you over. I had no other choice but to leave you behind"
           "And when he didn't send for me. What did you do?" I said cutting her short
           "I reminded him everyday" She said calmly,  He assured me every time I broached the topic that he was going to send for you once he got settled and comfortable"
          "Oh and you believed him?"
          "I did not let the issue lie low until he told me he sent you over to his uncle's place for you to learn a trade. He said it was best for you if you were going to inherit his business"
           "Oh my gosh! She believed those sweet lies of his again? You're a dimwit"
           "I was ignorant! I'm aware of it, You can't blame me. I was blinded by the garments, gold and money he threw into my laps. I never had such privileges. I found out he told me lies and I confronted him. I told him I was going to file for divorce if he did not bring you over. This is where our problems began. I do not understand why he was so afraid of having children.

         
          
    
    
    "Oh and you believed him?"
    "I did not let the issue lie low until he told me he sent you over to his uncle's place for you to learn a trade. He said it was best for you if you were going to inherit his business"
    "Oh my gosh! She believed those sweet lies of his again? You are a dimwit"
    "I was ignorant! I am aware of it. You can't blame me. I was blinded with the garments, gold and money he threw into my laps. I never had such privileges. I found out he told me lies and I confronted him. I told him I was going to file for divorce if he did not bring you over. This is where our problems began. I do not understand why he was so afraid of having children. He slept with me but he used contraceptives every time.
     "Enough!" I shouted. I could not bear to hear more. Her very presence and existence irritated me.
     "I would not have you talk to your mother like that" A voice called out from behind me. It was that of Joe. He was raging like lion.
     "Hey Joe please can you have a good talk with him". He has ears for you alone. Her words worked magic as immediately it dissolved his rage.
He went over to her side, wrapping his arms over her before whispering the words "I love you into her ears. You should have informed me"
     "I could not bring myself to. I love you Joe. I would be glad to know if you still care and treasure me dearly as before.
     "More than you can imagine. Do you think I loved to see you go? I could not speak because I did you wrong"
    "Aww Hussein how can I ever repay your steadfast love?"
    "Ssh" He said placing his finger on her mouth. "As long as you belong to me, that's all I ask"
    "I was always yours" She said smiling
    "Come over son". Joe called out to me. "Today marks the day of new beginnings in this household"

It was hard to let go of all the hurts and pain but the way the two looked, so happy together, dissolved the heart ache I felt. It was good to have her home. The days were going to be promising.
                                                                                        Love,
                                                                                         Ali














































































   
Oct 27, 2011

Words Mama Never Said (B)

       As I set to work, my eyes caught a red velvet fabric lying fallow on the grubby ground. It had been neatly tucked undernea...
Read article
Sep 30, 2011

The Words Mama Never Said




                                                                                                 December 1988
Dear Diary,

Today I sit, indite and recall blissful but vexatious memories
Pleasant but painstaking events
All within this spherical world
How words yet so easy to comprehend
When out do not diffuse in peace

As they pierce you deep
Making it hard for regurgitation
Today my aim is to pay what I owe to the past
My salutation
And acknowledgement
Of the words mama never said

Sep 30, 2011

The Words Mama Never Said

                                                                                                 December 1988 Dear Diary, T...
Read article
Mar 17, 2011

Friends in Disguise!





 Don't u just hate them? The ones that stick their ugly looking heads when things seem okay and redraw it quickly when the going is tough. The ones that come to you smiling when they see you and within a few seconds of your absence, they have their mouths running. They spill out words your ears can't seem to understand and accept. To some, your ears have become accustomed to their loud noise and irrelevant talks. I call them friends in disguise.

Mar 17, 2011

Friends in Disguise!

 Don't u just hate them? The ones that stick their ugly looking heads when things seem okay and redraw it quickly when the goin...
Read article

His Love Letter to U!




My Dearest Beloved, 
              Don't you hear the still small voice saying "Let me in, Let me in" over and over again? It is not forceful but pleasant. It is an angelic sound that plays softly in your heart. It says "I want to come in, for you to  partake in the sweet soft sound that I have plenty of, but are you willing to let me in so you can enjoy the melodies from it?" It says "I have the love you want. I have it in

His Love Letter to U!

My Dearest Beloved,                Don't you hear the still small voice saying "Let me in, Let me in" over and over...
Read article
Mar 15, 2011

Your worst Enemy is U!!!!



Hell no! what do u mean? I love myself. You must be insane. Yes that's what I utter under my breath when people say "I am my worst enemy". What do they know about me? What gives them the audacity to jump into conclusions about me!!!
Mar 15, 2011

Your worst Enemy is U!!!!

Hell no! what do u mean? I love myself. You must be insane. Yes that's what I utter under my breath when people say "I am my w...
Read article
Mar 6, 2011

Get Back to your Dreams

I look at how natural it has become for kids to come up with promising dreams about how they picture their world. It might be dreams about what they want to become or a desire to not be poor. Whatever way you look at it, they got a dream running up their small but great minds. 

On the other hand, I marvel at the change that occurs once we become adults. Those dreams that were so promising to us have lost the drive to make them reality. Our hope for the future, we decide to dash it out?

I thought a dream was a force that made us very uncomfortable with the position we lie in. It makes us itchy so we can strive for a change, for more comfort but why do some forgo what brings to them benefit?

It is because they have lost hope in dreaming. They are lacking the ability to persevere in situations that are unlikely now to yield change. They are tired of waiting endlessly with no change coming forth but still all are mere excuses and hindrances towards that great life you want.
Mar 6, 2011

Get Back to your Dreams

I look at how natural it has become for kids to come up with promising dreams about how they picture their world. It might be dreams abo...
Read article

Latest Instagrams